


Heart's In Overdrive

by lifecaughtinyoursway



Category: Glee
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Fix-It of Sorts, Multi, S5 rewrite, Slow Burn, for another ship, like ridiculously show, mutual idiots slow, slow as hell slow burn for one ship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:47:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26229685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifecaughtinyoursway/pseuds/lifecaughtinyoursway
Summary: The McKinley kids have moved to New York finally after graduating, but the city's got more in store for them than they can bargain for. Multiple ships, some canon breakups, about as much chaos as the show actually was. This summary sucks but I hope the work doesn't.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson & Sam Evans, Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel, Elliott "Starchild" Gilbert & Kurt Hummel, Elliott "Starchild" Gilbert/Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry & Kurt Hummel, Rachel Berry/Jesse St. James, Rachel Berry/Santana Lopez
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's this chapter's song: You Matter to Me from Waitress. YouTube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AREDtpRZTSA

The door to Kurt and Rachel's loft slid shut with a dull thud. 

Kurt Hummel dropped his school bag unceremoniously, raking a hand through his deflating hairstyle. After a full day of NYADA classes, a shift at Vogue, and a last minute cover at the Spotlight, he thought he might pass out if he spent one more minute on his feet. The loft was blissfully (and unusually) silent. Despite the fact that the sun was beginning to set, Rachel and Blaine were nowhere to be found. Kurt chose not to question it and flopped onto the couch.

"Yo!" A groggy voice yelped. Kurt scrambled off the couch. "What the _hell _?"__

____

____

A lump Kurt hadn't noticed shifted. The blanket covering the cushions folded back and a sleepy-eyed Sam Evans sat up and stretched. Kurt rolled his eyes, settling into a nearby armchair. He should have known a quiet empty apartment was too good to be true.

"Great to see you too, Sam." Kurt said dryly. "In my apartment...on my couch...asleep." Since graduation, most of the glee club had moved to New York yet Sam seemed to be the only one still couch surfing without his own place. His couch of choice was all too often Kurt's. 

"Not asleep anymore," Sam said, not picking up on the sarcasm. He took in Kurt's disheveled state. "You're back late."

Kurt wasn't sure if that was a question or a statement. "Emergency cover at work," he offered as an explanation. "Sorry, didn't see you on the couch."

Sam shrugged. "Happens."

He slid his phone out of his pocket and went quiet as he swiped around. Kurt considered, but didn't even have the energy to put up a fight about Sam crashing in the apartment again. Clearly the short lived conversation was over and he didn't particularly care to pick it back up. Instead, he curled up into the soft leather of the chair and allowed his eyes to close. The two sat there in silence long enough that Kurt had nearly managed to fall asleep himself when the loft door clattered open again. 

Rachel Berry and Blaine Anderson spilled into the living room, puncturing Kurt's precious silence. 

"Hi Sam!" Blaine said in a tone that was both far too loud and far too unsurprised for Kurt's liking. Blaine bent down to kiss Kurt on the cheek. "Hey babe, how was your day?" He joined Sam on the couch, Rachel bustling around in the kitchen behind them. She filled up the electric kettle on the counter and soon steam rose from the spout.

"The absolute longest," Kurt responded, mustering up a weak smile. "I think I need to sleep for seventeen years. The next time Carson calls out last minute I'm making Santana pick up the shift, I swear to god. And Gunther was an absolute nightmare- he had me perform a good third of The Boy From Oz by the end of my shift. But how was your day, where were you guys?"

Rachel took that as her cue to join the gang in the living room. She paced back and forth excitedly, clutching a mug of tea and honey. "I take it you're up to date on the NYADA chat rooms?" She asked in lieu of a response.

"Of course." Kurt was busy, not living on Mars. 

"So then you've heard that Casey Nicholaw is rumored to be directing the long awaited off-Broadway musical adaptation of Ferris Bueller's Day Off." There was a worrying glint in her eyes that Kurt recognized as the "Rachel Berry Will Destroy You to Get to the Top Immediately" look.

"Yes, of course. Rachel, even if I wasn't running on three hours of sleep, this story would be putting me to sleep. What's your point?"

"Well..." Rachel said, pausing for dramatic effect. Sam leaned in closer, equally as dramatic. "Guess who scored an audition!"

Suddenly, Kurt was wide awake. "No. Way. Absolutely no way."

"Yes way!" Rachel squealed. "This guy that Brody introduced me to when we were dating knows this girl who works for one of the producers and remembered me from that Thanksgiving rager we accidentally threw, and thought I'd be the perfect Sloane! She pulled a few strings-"

"-also known as Rachel cyber-harassed her for an audition until she found an empty time slot next week for her," Blaine interjected. "At which point Rachel tracked me down like a bloodhound and virtually locked me in a practice room while she sang every musical under the sun trying to pick the perfect audition piece. That's why we're home so late."

Rachel faux pouted. "You could have left whenever you wanted! ...I was MOSTLY kidding about hiding every tube of hair gel in this loft if you didn't help me." Kurt shuddered at the thought and mentally reminded himself to stash away some gel before Hurricane Rachel had a chance to make good on her promise.

"Hey, 'mostly' is not good enough for this," Blaine said, gesturing at his helmet of a hairstyle. "That's a serious threat and you know it Ms. Berry."

"Okay, okay, okay, break it up you two," Sam cut in with a grin. "Rachel, or should I say the future Miss Sloane, help me in the kitchen?" Rachel giggled and they left Kurt and Blaine in the living room. Blaine waited a moment, then piled onto the armchair into Kurt's lap. 

"Hey gorgeous," he said, looping his arms around Kurt's neck. Kurt lazily ducked out of the way as Blaine leaned in for a kiss.

"No, not right now." Blaine pouted down at him. It was cute, but not nearly convincing enough.

"Babe, I haven't see you all day," he whined. Kurt pressed a chaste kiss to his lips and forced a small smile. 

"I'm sorry B, I'm exhausted." 

Blaine laid his head down on Kurt's chest. "I'll make it worth your while..." He wiggled his eyebrows in a decidedly un sexy manner.

Kurt rolled his eyes and took Blaine by the hips, shifting his weight off of him so he could stand up. Blaine caught his hand before he could go much further. "Get a room you two!" Sam called from the kitchen, waving a wooden spoon at the couple. 

"Last time I checked, we HAD a room in this apartment. And you didn't," Kurt said. Sam laughed and went back to cooking, but Blaine wasn't so amused. 

"Hey, not cool Kurt." Blaine trailed behind Kurt as he crossed to their bedroom, his playful pout melting into a frown. "Sorry that we can't all find a massive loft the minute we move to a new city. Sam's trying to find a place but it's not exactly easy to find an apartment with cheap enough rent for a single person to afford."

"Especially when they're unemployed like a certain best friend of yours," Kurt grumbled, shedding his jacket and button up in favor of a soft glee club sweatshirt. "And it's not like he's trying all that hard. Sam spends more time on my couch than I do these days." 

Blaine exhaled sharply and opened his mouth to argue, but Kurt cut him off with a sigh. "You're right, I'm sorry, I'm just tired. Of all the random McKinley kids that have crashed in this loft, Sam's one of the more considerate. I really don't mind it. I think I just need to turn in for the night." 

Blaine's expression softened. "Alright babe. Want me to make you some tea or something before you go to bed?" Kurt shook his head but smiled.

"I'm just gonna turn on some music and pass out for the next six years. Tell Sam and Rachel goodnight for me?" Blaine nodded and reached up to kiss his forehead before bowing out of the room. Kurt could faintly hear the trio chatting and laughing in the kitchen, but he popped in his earbuds and cranked up a calm playlist to easily drown the voices out. 

Finally, blissfully, Kurt cut the lights and tucked himself between the sheets. He fell deep asleep almost immediately after his head hit the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't written fan fiction in a good three years, and never for Glee so this was interesting. I know this chapter's pretty short, it's mostly just establishing the world and characters so don't worry the rest should be longer. Also I wrote most of this the night before all my college apps are due despite still needing to finish an entire four essays. Priorities. Thanks for reading :)


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song, very very Kurt: And You Don't Even Know It from Everybody's Talking About Jamie (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7C3FuFWDdw)

"So did you hear that Sebastian Smythe moved to Manhattan?" Tina Cohen-Chang asked, passing Sam a salad bowl. 

The gang was crowded around Kurt and Rachel's tiny dining room table for their customary Monday night potluck. Kurt, Rachel, Sam, and Blaine of course, but also their friends Santana Lopez, Mercedes Jones, Artie Abrams, and Tina. They'd slowly all moved to the city since Blaine and Sam's class graduated and Rachel had been quick to rush everyone into committing to weekly dinners. Though, she thought about it now, she hadn't necessarily meant that she'd always be hosting.

"Now that's a name I haven't heard in ages," Mercedes said. 

"Yeah, Tina, how'd you even know that?" Sam piled salad onto his plate. 

Tina looked surprised. "It was on his Instagram the other day," she said, rummaging through her bag for her phone. She fished it out and tapped the screen a couple times until a picture of Sebastian and a group of well dressed guys popped up. As the phone got passed around, she continued, "I recognized the park they're in. It's a couple blocks north of NYU, he apparently goes there now but we don’t have any classes together or anything."

"I can't believe you still follow that guy," Blaine said, handing the phone off. He laughed a little, and glanced over at his fiancée, hoping Kurt wasn't upset by the mention of his once-nemesis. Kurt, to his credit, appeared genuinely unbothered. "I haven't heard from him since junior year." 

"You know Tina," Sam threw an arm around her shoulders in a teasing manner. "Even if she met someone once, they're still in her contacts to this day." Tina blushed a little, but it was accurate. She knew everybody. 

"It's true, girl. I wouldn't be surprised if you still followed that Harmony girl from Regionals that one year," Mercedes jumped in. She reached for Blaine and Santana's plates, stacking them neatly in front of her. Tina's cheeks somehow flushed a shade even more crimson. 

Rachel gasped, ever dramatic. "You do not! That little snake stole my song."

"Rachel, unlike the ever effervescent Ms. Lupone," Kurt cut in dryly, "You don't own 'Buenos Aires'. We weren't even ever planning on performing it." Rachel huffed, still not quite convinced. The other former glee club members shared a glance, confirming that none of them had ever wished to sing backup for Rachel on a song from Evita, shockingly. 

"You should be careful." Kurt rose, taking Mercedes' stack of plates and beginning to clear the table. "She's what, a senior now? Maybe you'll see her around NYADA next year." Blaine rolled his eyes at him playfully, knowing he was just deliberately stirring the pot at this point. Rachel’s eyes narrowed. 

Kurt quickly beelined to the kitchen, but Rachel followed him just as fast. "Not funny, Kurt! She can't get into NYADA, she just can't. Our types are too alike, she'll be competing with me for every part." She continued to ramble as Kurt turned on the sink and started rinsing off plates. The water tuned her out a little. Through the diatribe, Mercedes and Artie made their way into the kitchen as well, packing up leftovers and helping Kurt with the dishes. 

"Besides," Rachel started losing steam, her one-sided argument winding down, "I doubt she could land an audition for Ferris in only her sophomore year." It was an egotistical move, for sure. Kurt was going to let it go until he heard a crash behind him. 

Artie paid no mind to the plate he had just shattered, wheeling over to Rachel immediately. "Ferris, as in 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off' Ferris?" Blaine rushed into the kitchen at the commotion. He and Mercedes busied themselves cleaning the ceramic shards Artie dropped. 

"Yes!" Rachel preened. "Casey Nicholaw's directing it and I'm going in for Sloane next week. Of course, it's only off Broadway" -as if that wasn't a huge deal, Kurt thought, amused- "but it's still a part." 

She and Artie disappeared back into the living room, chattering away about the movie and what Rachel knew about how it was going to be adapted. As they moved out of earshot Kurt caught Artie's "Matthew Broderick, you know, Ferris, was guest lecturing at school the other day and when I showed him the project I've been working-" 

"I don't know how you boys do it, living with Miss Broadway Bound Diva" Mercedes said, but her tone was pleasant. "Someone needs to knock her down a few pegs and there aren't any glee competitions around to do it like in high school." 

"She's really not so bad," Blaine said. He finished loading the leftovers into the fridge and submerged the last of the dishes in the sink to soak for a while. "Plus, you're not doing so bad yourself, Miss Soon-To-Be-Signed-Recording-Artist." 

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Cedes, what?" Sure, they'd all been busy, but he would have expected Mercedes to have told him such big news.

Mercedes waved off his question. "It's not a big deal, really. Santana and I just recorded a little demo of one of my songs and it's getting a little buzz on Youtube and the socials, that's all. We haven't gotten any real offers yet. Your hubby is just optimistic for us." She elbowed Blaine in the ribs lightly. 

The trio joined the rest of their friends in the living room, pulling up chairs and squeezing in on couches. Kurt and Blaine piled in next to Sam and Santana. Mercedes settled in next to Tina in the armchair. Thankfully, Rachel and Artie seemed to be calming down from their mutual Ferris freakout. Artie was just finishing up the tail end of a story about some department award his latest short film had won when Tina spoke up. 

"Alright guys. I know it's been a weird couple of months, with everyone transitioning and everything. I just wanted to tell you guys how glad I am that I've been through it with my closest friends." She smiled specifically here at Mercedes and Santana, who shared an apartment with her in Chelsea. "We've all grown so much since high school and I feel so lucky to have grown with all of you." 

"Aww, Tina," Artie said, pulling her into a hug. "We love you too, girl." The others nodded, murmuring something along the same line. Blaine, ever sentimental, squeezed Kurt's hand a little tighter. 

While everyone was focused, Santana made an announcement too. "And we've got cause to celebrate tonight. Trouty Mouth, wanna tell them the news?" Everyone's heads swiveled to look at Sam. He sat up a little straighter. 

"Okay, yeah, so you guys know I've been looking for a job since I moved here." He said, far too chill for someone who apparently had big news. "I thought maybe I'd try my hand at modeling, see if maybe I could get any gigs with these abs."

"Please tell me you're not a stripper again," Rachel blurted out. The gang laughed, although it was clear she wasn't the only one concerned that that was where this news was going to go.

"God, Rachel, no." He said, rolling his eyes. "For your information, a job is a job, but no. As a matter of fact, I went in for this interview thing at some fancy ass modeling agency, uh, house of bitchette or something-"

Kurt's jaw dropped. "House of Bitchette?" His pronunciation was much closer to the original French. Kurt was all too familiar with HoB from Vogue. They snatched the new up and comers in modeling and turned them into superstars. He always remembered to make sure he got their names when they came into Vogue the first time because they'd definitely be back. 

"Yeah, that's it!" Sam's smile was almost too wide for his face. "Should've figured Vogue boy would've known it. Anyway, she had me in for a consultation thing and told me they’d sign me on probation. Basically, I’ll have to do a bunch of random catalogue stuff while they decide if they want to keep me for real but hey, it’s a job!” 

Sam held his fist out to Kurt. “And that means I’ll be moving off your couch! The House got me a place in soho with some of their other models. Win-win!”

Kurt accepted the first bump, still stunned. The rest of them jumped up to congratulate Sam but his heart wasn’t in it. Just another friend to add to his "moved to NYC and immediately found success” list. Rachel had her big audition, Mercedes and Santana had their song, Artie's films were clearly doing alright, Blaine got into NYADA on his first try, Tina had NYU and now Sam had this. 

o-o-o

“It’s just frustrating, you know?” Kurt said the next day. It was an unusually slow day at the Spotlight so he and Dani were holed up in a booth pretending to fill ketchup bottles and gossiping about their coworkers. The only other one on the clock, Carson, was on stage, and had been there cycling through songs for nearly an hour, so they didn’t even have to get up to perform. “I don’t know how they did it but it feels like everyone got their big break as soon as they moved here but me. Don’t get me wrong, I love it here at the diner and at Vogue and NYADA, but I’m working so hard and I still feel…”  
“Unfulfilled?” Dani offered. Their manager, Gunther, shot the pair a dirty look from behind the counter and they quickly scrambled to actually do some work. 

“Yeah, exactly. That’s the perfect word.” Kurt sighed. “I don’t even know why, everything seems like it should be perfect, I mean I have my jobs and Blaine and…” He trailed off. It should have felt perfect. If someone had told him two years ago that he would get into NYADA, he would have been ecstatic. Tack on Vogue and the famous Spotlight Diner and marrying his high school sweetheart (even if they did break up for a while) and he wouldn’t have believed it. But now, something felt off, something felt missing. 

Dani clearly saw the silence as an indication of something else. “Are you sure there’s nothing wrong between you and Blaine?” She reached for another ketchup bottle then gasped before Kurt could answer. “Did he cheat on you again? Kurt, I swear, if you took him back after-”

“No! No, we’re fine, we’re fine. Blaine’s...great.” Dani raised an eyebrow. “Okay, he’s not perfect either. I mean, it would be weird if it was, right? I just… it’s a little annoying how Blaine just gets handed everything, I mean I practiced months for my NYADA audition and he never even mentioned his yet suddenly he got in first try and I didn’t. And he’s in all my classes even though he’s a freshman and then we spend every second together at home and I… it’s just a little suffocating.”

He forced a smile. “But it’s fine, really. It’s growing pains, we’ll sort it out.” He went back to ketchup filling, clearly wanting this conversation to be over.

“Whatever you say, Kurt.” Dani allowed. They moved on to more workplace gossip- apparently Carson’s partner had booked the National Tour of Wicked and promptly dumped him. Eventually, the door opened and a quartet of excited teens piled into a booth. Dani and Kurt both gave each other the ‘are you gonna get them or am I’ look, but Kurt was the first to give in. 

“Fine, I’ll take them,” Kurt acquiesced, rising from the booth. “And hey, thanks for letting me vent. I couldn’t really talk to my other friends about it or-”

“Or they’d think you’re just jealous, I get it. Now go,” she motioned. “Those eager beavers look like they’re dying for you to sing them something.” Indeed, the table was hoping for a serenade or two. When Kurt tried to get their drink orders, they instead introduced themselves as Chelsea, Trina, Marvin, and Will, and launched into their life story. Turns out they were high schoolers on a school break trip to the city for the first time and they were “so excited to be HERE in THE CITY.” 

As overzealous as they were, Kurt saw a lot of his high school self in them. If he squinted, it was almost like a younger Kurt and Rachel were there with them, squeezed in between Matt and Trina. He remembered how excited they were when they went to NYC for Nationals, how they were overflowing with hope and dreams. Where had all of that gone?

Finally, after Kurt had wrestled out their orders and answered half a million questions, he was about to leave before one stopped him. A shorter boy in a beanie, (he thought maybe Marvin?) asked tentatively: “Hey, so, uh, your coworker is great and all-” Kurt followed his gaze to Carson, still playing piano and singing, but he’d switched over from show tunes to every depressing song Sam Smith had ever written, “-but we were wondering if, um, we could request a song?”

“Yeah, of course,” Kurt said, and the table looked relieved. “Carson, buddy! Take your intermission. Or maybe… several.” All signs pointed to Carson’s recent breakup news being true. He merely nodded and shuffled sadly into the breakroom. Dani mouthed “thank you!” to Kurt, clearly as over Carson butchering In the Lonely Hour as the quartet was. 

“He was kind of bringing the mood down, huh?” The group nodded, still as enthusiastic as ever. “Okay, what’ll it be, what do you guys wanna hear?”

“Do you know Everybody’s Talking About Jamie?” Chelsea asked hopefully. 

“Um, Chels? This is a Broadway restaurant, that’s on the West End.” Trina said. Chelsea began to frown so Kurt quickly jumped in.

“I won’t tell anybody if you don’t,” he said with a wink. “Of course I know it, coming right up.” ETAJ was a unique request, he couldn’t remember ever performing anything from it at work. He and his coworkers liked to stick to the classics, the big shows: Rent, Phantom of the Opera, Wicked, Hamilton. They’d throw in some of whatever the newest popular shows were, but overall they found that the more people knew a song, the higher the tips. As the opening chords to And You Don’t Even Know It blared from the loudspeaker, Kurt decided he was alright with going home empty handed just this once. 

“There's a clock on the wall and it's moving too slow

It's got hours to kill and a lifetime to go

And I'm holding my breath 'til I hear the last bell

Then I'm coming out hard and I'm giving 'em hell”

Of the scattered tables throughout the diner, it looked like only Chelsea’s group were familiar with the song. Either way, the beat was catchy enough that the rest stayed engaged anyway. Kurt let his worries melt away for the few short minutes the song played and lost himself in the music. 

“I've got the dreams, I've got the style

I've got the moves to make you smile

So kiss my ass goodbye

'Cause I'm gonna be the one”

At the chorus, Kurt leapt onto an unoccupied table, really putting on a show. A few people had started to clap along and the quartet was singing along. Will pulled out his phone to record the performance. 

“You're in my lane, you're in my light

Get out my way, I'm taking flight

And I ain't coming back

And I'm gonna kiss the sun”

As the song continued, Kurt felt transported to the last time he had sung his heart out like this: auditioning with Carmen Tibideaux. The song had a similar message to his NYADA audition with Not The Boy Next Door but it was even more than that. Kurt could feel the growth he had gone through in the years between the two. He was a better actor, a better singer, a better person. He might not have achieved all his dreams yet, but he was on the path to greatness and that was okay for now.

The song ended and he hopped off the table to bring the group their food. “Oh. My. God.” Chelsea squealed. “Oh my God! That was amazing, thank you so much!” Her friends nodded in agreement. After a lot more gushing and a few drink refills, Kurt was finally able to break away and joined Dani at their booth. 

“Dude.” Dani said as he sat back down, immediately going back to filling ketchup dispensers. “Put down the ketchup and listen to me for a sec.” 

He raised his hands in mock surrender. “Alright, alright! What’s up?”

“That’s it!” She said triumphantly. “That’s the thing that you’re missing. It’s performing.” Dani looked at him like she’d just solved world hunger but Kurt remained skeptical. 

“Uh, Dani? I perform all the time, that’s like half of my job here.” 

She rolled her eyes at his sarcasm. “Not like that you don’t. I’ve never seen you get that into a song here before. Performing like that, centerstage, with a song you love? That’s the missing piece, I’m sure of it.” 

“Okay…” Kurt said slowly. He was starting to see her point, except: “How am I supposed to do that, though? I can’t exactly sing whatever I want, Gunther’ll just fire me. I do have to keep at least one paying job.” 

Dani was emphatic. “You’re not thinking big enough. Performing at the Spotlight is one thing, and I’m not saying you should stop. But you need a bigger venue, you need more control over your material, you need an audience.” She paused for emphasis. “You need to start a band.” 

Kurt laughed. “Me? In a band? I wouldn’t even know where to begin. I mean, I don’t play any instruments, I barely know a couple guitar chords and I-” Dani cut him off before he could start rambling. 

“That’s why I’m gonna help you,” she said calmly, like she was explaining it to a kindergartener. Kurt wanted to protest again, but he thought back to the song, how alive it had made him feel. He hadn’t felt so strongly about performing in a long time. 

“You really think we could start a band.” 

Dani wasn’t sure if that was a statement or a question. Either way, she continued quickly. “Don’t question it too much right now, Kurt. Just think about it, okay?”

Despite every thought swirling around in his head as to why he should say no, Kurt nodded. “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So um I had 90% of this done, copied it to check for word count and deleted the entire thing... that was a minor set back but lesson learned about working on drafts in ao3 anyway enjoy because I'm still in pain about that. Also I'd love to hear anyone's thoughts, comments are really motivating haha. :)


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song(s) for the chapter: Marry the Night and Don't Stop Believing (s4), Glee cast versions. I promise that using Glee songs for the chapters won't be that common, you'll just see why it's relevant in this chapter specifically.

Kurt didn’t do hyperboles, but this had been the longest forty nine minutes of his life.

“Remember when you thought an hour wouldn’t be enough to get through all the auditions?” Santana asked him, glancing at her watch for the millionth time. She and Kurt were anxiously sitting behind a desk in the NYADA studio Kurt had rented. Across the cavernous space, Dani and her friends that she had recruited for the audition fiddled with their instruments, occasionally breaking out into song. But no potential band mates were in sight. 

“Shut up Santana.” Kurt was, in fact, painfully aware of this. “I’m still not even sure why you’re here.” 

“Because,” Santana propped her feet up on the desk and crossed her arms. “Someone has to keep your Madonna cover band from becoming the gayest thing ever. Making a Madonna cover band is already toeing the line.” It was the same excuse she had given when Kurt and Dani left his apartment that morning and she had decided to tag along. Though, she hadn’t given him an explanation for how she got into his place or why she was there either.

“And that’s your job how?” Kurt shot back, solely fighting to fill the time. 

“I don’t see anyone else around here trying.” She rifled through the miscellaneous papers in front of them. Among them was one of the sign up sheets Kurt had hung outside of one of NYADA’s dorms. “Maybe it’s for the best that no one’s showing up, because this guy...”

Kurt plucked the paper out of her hands. “You might be right there. I mean, what kind of name is Starchild?”

A new voice spoke up from the doorway, confident and a little brash despite being insulted upon arrival. “It’s an homage. To Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars?” The newcomer flashed them a devilish smile and Kurt had the decency to blush a little. Starchild would have been tall already, but the platform boots made him positively tower over Dani as he crossed to the stage area. He waited for no further invitation to take command of the space, his glitter clad outfit catching the light streaming in from the windows.

“Sorry I'm late. People kept stopping me on the street, asking if they could take their picture with me.” Kurt scoffed. He wasn’t really one to talk about flashy outfits, but for some reason this one rubbed him the wrong way.

“Yeah, cause you look frickin badass!” Dani enthused, shooting Kurt a ‘be nice’ look. Starchild nodded appreciatively. 

“It’s a little Project Runway. Season six,” Kurt murmured to Santana, but even she seemed taken with him. She elbowed him in the ribs, hard. 

“What’s your problem, Hummel?” 

Dani glanced back and forth between the two at the desk and their single auditioner. “Do you have a song prepared?” She said quickly, in an attempt to diffuse the tension. 

“Yeah, of course,” Dani handed him a microphone and he stepped to the center of the space. “It’s by one of my favorite artists, someone who always inspires me to be myself...no matter what other people think.” This last line was clearly directed at Kurt, and delivered with another megawatt smile. 

“So he can dish it and take it,” Santana said gleefully. The level of sass in this room was rising higher than even Kurt thought he could take. This trio could easily make his life a living hell.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Dani encouraged, and that was all Starchild needed to hear.

“I'm gonna marry the night

I won't give up on my life

I'm a warrior queen

Live passionately, tonight”

Dani’s eyes widened with the opening lines, quickly picking up the chords to the song. Kurt could only assume his expression read just as shocked. He was expecting theatricality with the ensemble but he had underestimated the voice that came along with it. Even without the mic, it would have soared through the room and filled every available space. Right out of the gate Starchild’s presence demanded their attention. 

“Homeboy’s got pipes!” Santana hissed, as if Kurt wasn’t watching the same awe inspiring performance. 

“I'm gonna lace up my boots

Throw on some leather and cruise

Down the streets that I love

In my fishnet gloves

I'm a sinner”

It was remarkable to Kurt, that someone could just charge in and be so comfortable not just with the group but in their own skin. Starchild seemed completely at ease. He played off of Dani and her friends, threw looks and facial expressions at Kurt and Santana, and looked wholly, honestly, fully himself. Kurt barely knew him, but he could tell that Starchild wasn’t the least bit stressed out to throw himself wholeheartedly into this performance. 

It was more than remarkable, it was almost threatening. Kurt prided himself on being outgoing but this guy made him look introverted. He couldn’t wrap his mind around how someone could have such a natural chemistry and lack of nerves in front of a room of strangers, especially strangers that he was supposed to impress. Kurt had always felt like he had to fight for attention, and this guy just beckoned it without even trying.

“Get Ginger ready climb to El Camino front

Won't poke holes in the seats with my heels cause that's

Where we make love

Come on and run

Turn the car on and run”

Definitely threatening. Those high notes were encroaching on Kurt’s territory. And if he was being completely honest, which he definitely wasn’t, a little bit upsetting. How was he supposed to be special and shine if he didn’t even have a unique sound in his own band? It wasn’t often that someone could match his range, god forbid best him at it. 

This fear crystallized when Santana slid a piece of paper across the desk to him. ‘Yes. A definite yes.’ Her halfhearted scrawl began a spiral of worry in the back of Kurt’s mind. 

Kurt came back to earth as the song drew to a close and Starchild handed Dani back her mic. 

“I would not be embarrassed to share the stage with you!” Santana said, with a level of enthusiasm Kurt had only seen her reserve for tearing Rachel Berry down. Although the mention of sharing the stage confused him, she wasn’t a part of his band as far as he knew, but he had more pressing issues to deal with at the moment.

“You just rocked it so hard,” Dani agreed. The three immediately fell into a rapid conversation about Gaga and costuming and guitar- which Starchild apparently played, another point for why he absolutely would dominate the band and absolutely couldn’t join- that seemed like it could go for hours if Kurt didn’t step in.

“Thank you for your time, Starchild.” Kurt couldn’t help the sharp tone he took when he said that ridiculous name. “But the performance...it’s not a fit. We’re thinking a little more low key.”

For the first time since he arrived, Starchild looked impacted by something Kurt had said, but before he could speak, Santana jumped in.

“Are you insane?” She said. There was the Santana that Kurt was more familiar with. “I’m sorry, would you mind stepping outside while I bitch slap some sense into my friend?”

Starchild shook his head. Kurt couldn’t quite tell, but under the eyeliner and glitter he looked a little disappointed. “No, it’s fine. If it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work.” He shot Dani and Santana one last smile and raised a hand in acknowledgement to Kurt. “Thanks for the audition.” And he was gone as soon as he came. 

Dani handed off her guitar to Santana and quickly rushed after Starchild. The door closed with a harsh thud that echoed throughout the studio. For a moment the only sound was Dani’s friends rushing to pack their equipment up. Unsurprisingly, Santana was the one to finally break the silence. 

“What the absolute fuck was that? You’re turning away Starchild, who was amazing, because ‘it’s not a fit’? Not to mention that he’s the only person who showed up to audition for our stupid band anyway.” 

Kurt stalked over to the desk and haphazardly began gathering up all the paper and notes. He shoved them into his bag unceremoniously. “Look, he was good, whatever, but it was just- hold on, OUR band? I don’t recall asking you to join, as a matter of fact.”

Santana snorted. “Obviously, because you couldn’t recognize talent if it slapped you in the face. That guy,” she said, gesturing sharply to the doorway, “was incredible. How exactly are you gonna justify letting him go?”

“It was just too much, okay?” Kurt threw his hands up in the air, exasperated. “The whole thing, the look, the song, it was just way too over the top. Not what I’m looking for.” 

“Oh, that’s rich! Do I have to remind you of some of the stuff you wore in high school? Starchild’s not the only one who liked Gaga.” 

Kurt crossed around the front of the desk again, done collecting his things. “And I was thrown into dumpsters! I got shoved into lockers and had slushies thrown in my face, some of them from you I might add.”

Santana merely raised an eyebrow. Kurt sighed, losing some of the fight. “Look, we go out onstage like that, and it’s gonna be high school all over again. What is so wrong with wanting to be non threatening, to be less controversial? Being well liked isn’t a crime.” She didn’t immediately respond and Kurt moved toward the door.

“Tell yourself whatever you want,” Santana said finally. Kurt paused, hand on the doorknob. “All I know is that you’re letting a hell of a performer go just because you’re worried about ruffling some feathers. The Kurt I thought I knew would never sacrifice his art for that. I thought that was the point of this whole band thing, to get to perform and do what you love. Maybe you should think about why you’re doing this in the first place.” 

He hesitated, considered turning back around. Santana’s words definitely had some merit. Kurt couldn’t deny that he had nothing but superfluous personal reasons for not bringing on Starchild. As much as he was intimidating and ostentatious, he was still an incredible singer. And Kurt had just sent him away. No contact, no real name, nothing.

But he didn’t have the energy to deal with that now. Kurt pushed through the door without another word to Santana and squeezed through the crowded NYADA corridor. Maybe he should just find Dani and call this whole thing off. Clearly, Kurt wasn’t made to front a band. 

Speak of the devil, Dani appeared in front of Kurt as he stepped out of the building onto the street. He shot her a questioning look, fearing the worst.

“He’s gone,” she confirmed. “I managed to catch up to him before he got to the subway, and I gave him our contact info, but…” 

“But I probably lost him for good acting like a power hungry diva?” Kurt filled in the blanks, deadpan. It was more of a statement than a question. Dani reluctantly nodded. 

“Well I didn’t want to say it…” She smiled despite the circumstances. “Hey, if it’s meant to be, he’ll call. If not, this city’s crawling with artists trying to be discovered.” 

But none of them would be anything like Starchild. Neither of them said it, but they could each tell the other was thinking it. They had their shot with one of the most incredible vocalists they’d ever seen, and they had blown it. Kurt had blown it. He supposed it was too late to despair over it now, and returned her smile. 

“We’ll see what happens.”

o-o-o-o-o

A few miles away, Rachel was gearing up for her Ferris audition. The lobby of the tiny off Broadway theatre was teeming with girls, running their lines and warming up quietly. Everywhere she looked, Rachel saw carbon copies of herself. Dozens of brunettes in jewel toned dresses that looked exactly like her closet at home, it was one of the first times in her life that Rachel felt ordinary. All around her she heard songs she had considered or almost picked, but she hadn’t heard her final pick, Heart of Glass by Blondie, being practiced yet and that was one piece of luck at least. 

One by one, names were called and the girls would disappear into the theatre. Rachel knew it wasn’t common for auditions, especially first open calls to be held in the actual space and it only heightened her stress more. Her knuckles turned white from how tightly she was clutching her audition binder. 

Luckily, the girl next to her struck up a conversation to distract her. “Hell of a morning, huh?” The girl asked politely. She stood out a little among the throngs, in Doc Martens instead of ballet flats or character shoes, with wild curly hair she had pulled back out of her face. Rachel mentally chastised herself for not thinking more outside of the box. The auditioners had been told that the show’s score was modeled after classic rock and other genres that were popular during Ferris Bueller’s time period. If there was ever a time to stray from the Broadway bound look, this was it. 

“You could say that, for sure,” Rachel said, laughing lightly. “I didn’t realize they’d keep us so long. I’ve been here since six.” 

The girl nodded knowingly. “Oh yeah, these non-Equity open calls are the worst. I take it this is your first one?” 

Rachel’s eyes widened. Her heart rate increased once again. “It’s that obvious?” She scanned her visage again, trying to spot what gave her away. 

“No, no, it’s alright,” she said, her tone reassuring. “You’re definitely a little green, but it’s okay. I think they’re looking for a fresh face on this one anyway. Someone they haven’t seen before.” She stuck her hand out. “I’m Lindsey, by the way.” 

“Rachel.” Rachel accepted the handshake and breathed deep a few times to slow her racing heart. “Thanks for chatting with me, I was going a little crazy overthinking everything. I just don’t want to mess anything up.” She wasn’t used to feeling this unsure, unconfident. This was what she’d been working for all of high school and college, but it was suddenly so much more overwhelming than she could have imagined. 

“Trust me, it’ll be alright. The first audition is always the scariest, it gets easier when you’ve got a couple under your belt and realize that there’ll always be another show, you know? Plus,” Lindsey smiled reassuringly, “Casey won’t even be there, I’ll bet you anything.” 

They conversed for a couple more minutes, Rachel’s nerves steadily winding down. She could do this, she was born to do this. Performing was what she lived for. All she had to do was sing her heart out and show the casting people that she was what they needed. 

Finally, the door opened again and Lindsey’s name was called. She immediately jumped to her feet, smoothing out her dress. 

“Really nice talking to you, Rachel!” She said, and her tone seemed genuine. For someone who had spent all of her school career in harsh competition for solos and the spotlight, Rachel was taken aback by how friendly and helpful someone directly competing against her could be. “Break a leg!”

“The same to you, of course.” Rachel shuffled around the sheet music in her binder, hoping she’d be called soon. The door swung shut slowly, but not before she heard Lindsey slate her audition.

“Hi, I’m Lindsey Park, and I’ll be performing Heart of Glass.”

Rachel’s heart sank. It figured that the perfect, confident, pulled together girl would just happen to sing the same song as her. With her luck, Rachel would be called next and she’d look like she copied Lindsey’s song. At the very least, they’d be directly compared. 

Frantically, she flipped through her binder to see what other options she had. There were about a dozen songs she could do at the drop of a hat, but they were all Broadway. Other than the Blondie, she didn’t have anything outside of theatre, let alone classic rock specifically. 

A few minutes must have passed in a panic, because a voice at the door soon called her name.

“Is there a Rachel Berry here?” 

Reluctantly, she stood up and followed into the theatre. 

The aisle between the door and the stage seemed a thousand miles long. Rachel took another deep breath and forced herself to focus. It didn’t matter that Lindsey just did the same song as her. She was Rachel Berry, she was going to kill it. She mentally called back to some of her favorite performances to quell her nerves: her Winter Showcase pieces, senior year nationals, her duets throughout the years with Finn, Mercedes, Kurt, Santana. And finally, she came back to the penultimate, the performance that changed her life. That first week of glee club when they had to convince Mr Schue to stay, the one that began the glee clubs string of Journey songs. That was where it all began, and look where she was now.

Tucked into the back corner of the stage was a small piano and pianist. After shakily waving at the casting panel Rachel beelined for that corner. She held out the binder to the smiling pianist, but at the last second she faltered. 

“I’m sorry, this is unorthodox,” she said, gently setting her binder down on the ground. “But do you know Don’t Stop Believing?”

The pianist looked a little annoyed about the lack of sheet music but nodded. Rachel turned, crossing to center stage before she could chicken out and go with her initial piece. The panel looked up as she approached. 

“Hi, I’m Rachel Berry and I’ll be performing Don’t Stop Believing.” Some of her fear dissolved as she spoke the words, not allowing her voice to waver and betray how nervous she was. There was no going back now.

The men and women behind the table looked a little surprised. “Whenever you’re ready,” a woman at the end said.

Rachel felt the tension in her shoulders release as the familiar opening flooded the stage. She’d performed this song for years, knew it like the back of her hand. As she began to sing the first verse, the stage around her melted away and was replaced by the familiar McKinley auditorium. To her right and left, it was almost like she could see Finn and Kurt and the rest of the glee club performing with her. 

“Just a small town girl

Livin' in a lonely world

She took the midnight train goin' anywhere” 

o-o-o-o-o

“And then she got called for her audition and she was singing Heart of Glass too! I swear to Barbra, I thought I was going to DIE on the spot but-”

“Rachel, this is all very exciting, but can it wait til I get home?” Kurt interjected. His phone was clamped between his shoulder and ear as he struggled home, both arms laden with groceries. He’d gotten jostled by the bustling crowds on the street more than once. It was a miracle he hadn’t dropped anything yet. 

“Oh, I guess.” Kurt could hear her pout over the phone. “I’ll call Mercedes or Tina then. But hey, how did band auditions go?” 

“They went,” he responded dryly. “One auditioner showed up, Santana and Dani liked him, but I think I might have scared him off.” He conveniently omitted his conflicted feelings about Starchild, and his little diva moment. 

“Well, you’ll figure it out. You always do.” In the background he could hear Rachel banging around in the kitchen. That was never a good sign, as confirmed by the smoke alarm that went off seconds later. “Yikes! Listen, I’ve gotta go. See you when you get home?” 

“See you in a bit, Rach.” He stopped at a bench, intending to set down his bags and hang up the call, but Rachel jumped back in before he could. 

“Wait! Did you get the soy milk I like?” The alarm was still ringing in the background, but leave it to Rachel to prioritize. 

Kurt rolled his eyes, as if she could see him. “Yes, I got the soy milk.” And Blaine’s favorite yogurt, and the only honey Rachel would eat, and about a million other items because it seemed like he was the only one who did any shopping anymore. 

“Thank you! You’re the best, Kurt.” She hung up the call without saying goodbye. Kurt haphazardly dumped his bags on the bench, trying to redistribute the weight before he set off on the last couple blocks back to the loft. 

He had managed to maneuver his three grocery bags down to two when his phone rang again in his pocket. Kurt fished it out with some difficulty, before ultimately deciding just to sit and take the call before soldiering on. He didn’t recognize the number but picked up anyway.

“Hello?”

“Hey, is this Kurt?” The voice on the other end sounded familiar but Kurt couldn’t immediately place it. More curiously, the voice sounded surprised to hear Kurt, even though they had called him. 

“Yes, this is he,” he said tentatively. 

“Oh, sweet, hey. It’s Starchild.” Kurt’s jaw dropped, something he hadn’t previously believed actually happened in real life. “Well, it’s Elliott, actually. Elliott Gilbert. Sorry for calling unannounced, I didn’t realize this was your number. Dani made it sound like it was hers.”

Kurt recovered from his shock in time to respond. “Not a problem...Elliott. What’s up?” The name felt awkward on his tongue, though he supposed it was better than Starchild.

“Dani just told me to give you guys a call, see about meeting up again or something. But I mostly called to say that it’s okay, I know she and your friend were upset about everything, but I get it. You’re going for a certain look, and I’m not it. I get it.” Elliott’s words were kind and understanding, but they made Kurt’s heart sink. He felt like a complete asshole for turning Elliott away just because he was feeling threatened, and doubly like an asshole for giving him an excuse that wasn’t even true.

“I appreciate it, but we talked-” 

Elliott cut him off unexpectedly. “Wait, I’m sorry, this is random, but is there any chance you know the Three Diamond Door, on Troutman street?” 

Kurt’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. The storefront behind him bore that same name, how did Elliott know? “Uh, yeah, it’s a couple blocks from my apartment. I just stopped in front of it, actually, why do you ask?” 

“Give me a second.” And just as quickly as the call had begun, it ended. 

Kurt tapped at the screen for a moment, wondering if maybe he had lost service. A text from Blaine about game night at Sam’s came through a few seconds later, proving that wasn’t the case. Bewildered still, he began to gather up his things. He figured he’d call Elliott back later and see what had happened. 

As he rose to leave, a tall but fairly nondescript man sat down on the opposite end of the bench. Kurt took a moment to scan the street when the man spoke.

“Looking for someone?”

He spun around. “Sort of, I just got off the phone with someone and- Elliott?” He gasped. The man, or rather Elliott, nodded, and Kurt sat back down.

“This toned down enough for you?” Elliott asked, but it was clear he was kidding. He was significantly less flashy, in a simple henley, jeans, and flannel. A beanie was pulled over most of his hair, but a little glitter still remained in his hairline and at the corners of his eyes. Those eyes, even without the eyeliner they were piercing. 

“Oh my God, I didn’t even recognize you!” 

Elliott laughed. “That’s kind of the point of a costume, isn’t it?” 

“It certainly made an impression,” Kurt retorted good naturedly. “But wow, what are the odds? What brings you to Bushwick, of all places?” He shifted the groceries on his lap. 

“Big fan of that laundromat,” Elliot gestured across the street without a hint of irony. “I figured I’d give you guys a call while I waited for some clothes but imagine my surprise when I saw the very same Kurt Hummel just across the way talking back. Thought I might as well just come talk to you in person.” That electric smile from before was even more potent up close.

“I gotta say, I’m stunned.” Kurt genuinely didn’t know what to say. “I would’ve just walked right past you if you hadn’t said something.” 

“Ah, the power of Alexander McQueen,” Elliott quipped. Kurt’s eyes lit up at the mention of one of his famous designers, and the two spiraled into a long conversation about fashion and costuming. Talking to Elliott one on one, seeing him as a real person, it quelled some of Kurt’s previous fears. Under all the eyeliner he was just another guy who loved music and fashion, just like Kurt. 

Their conversation was interrupted by a string of texts from Rachel, immediately assuming he had been kidnapped. “Shit, that’s my roommate,” Kurt said. He rose from the bench again. “I’ve gotta get these groceries home.”

“No worries,” Elliott assured him. “Probably about time to go switch my loads anyway. But hey, nice talking to you. For real, this time.”

“Yeah, you too!” Kurt was surprised to find that he genuinely meant it. 

They both walked towards the nearest intersection, Elliott crossing one way and Kurt the other. Before their light could change, however, Elliott asked one final question. “Wait, before you go, what do you say? Think you could maybe give me another audition?” 

Kurt didn’t have to think it over. “No, definitely not.” Elliott looked crestfallen, but Kurt quickly continued, “You’re in. As Elliott, or Starchild, or someone in between. Whoever you wanna be, you’re in.”

The smile on Elliott’s face made his heart soar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Elliott has arrived!! I love updating this fic, it’s like yelling into the void bc no one comments or says anything (not that you shouldn’t comment it’s just funny lmao). Also, I had to write Rachel an audition that it would actually be appropriate to use Don't Stop for; the moment in the Funny Girl audition was wonderful but that's not at all a reasonable song to sing for that show haha. Non theatre fan gleeks don't despair, there'll continue being theatre references probably but I promise it won't be super important to understand them to understand the plot. Just in case anything wasn't clear: green refers to an actor that's new in the field or the professional world, Equity is the stage actors union, an open call is when anyone can show up and audition for professional shows regardless of union status, and a slate/slating is when you introduce your name and material at the beginning of an audition. Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

heyo what's up, so I basically decided this story wasn't going anywhere but I have some other, more interesting ideas for some kurt/elliott or kurt & elliott stuff so ig stay tuned? thanks to yall who read it


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